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Disciplining our thoughts is the foundation of creating deep inner peace. Every thought creates a vibration of energy, and in turn, that energy resonates within each one of our cells. The Universal law states that the energy we put out to the Universe is what's returned to us. “What you give, is what you get, what you reap is what you sow.”

It is crucial to be aware of the energy we are creating with our words and thoughts both with others and ourselves. When I was going through my healing, I became conscious to the fact that every time I repeated a story or experience that was negative, I was beating a negative drum to a deafening beat. With every repetitive negative thought, the vibration became stronger and stronger within me. Imagine one person sitting and beating a drum. Now imagine 100 people sitting in a circle, each beating a drum to the same beat. The sound would be 100 times louder and stronger. It is critical to be aware of the stories that we are telling and retelling and the words we are using over and over again. Even repeating the name of an illness or condition will magnify the negative vibrational frequency. Just like the beating of the drum, the energy of the negative experience is growing stronger and louder within us. This negative energy has a direct impact on both our physical and mental wellbeing, causing dis-ease in our mind and body. As I began exploring these theories, I realized that if I was going to put myself in the power position, it was time for me to “take charge of my response to it all.” My choices and actions will define my experiences and reality in each moment, and it is my responsibility to choose wisely. I learned the importance of standing guard and being mindful of the energy I allow into my space as well as the energy I put out to the Universe.

When we have a negative encounter with people, it is most important that we do not meet that person with the same anger, hate or frustration. What we put out is going to resonate, vibrate and come back to us like a boomerang. This is a very difficult concept to embrace and even harder at times to live. By default, our automatic response is a knee jerk reaction. Instead, embrace a new way of handling difficult people and situations by "practicing the pause” (which I will be talking about in more depth in a future blog). Take a moment to close your eyes and breath in deeply or walk away for a few minutes. This will help to ground your emotions, allowing you to respond in a way that will eradicate or, at the very least, minimize the impact of any negative energy.

There is no doubt that it can be challenging when faced with another person's negative words and actions. Making the choice to meet these challenges with kindness and compassion has nothing to do with whether or not the other deserves it, but because you do. It is not for us to judge who is deserving of kindness, but to give freely, and in doing so, we set the stage for peace to generate within ourselves.

As negative people or circumstances come into our space, and we remain fully committed to meeting them with kindness and compassion, or at the very least neutral emotions, we have put ourselves into the power position. Again, just like the “5 Pillars of Transformation” I speak of in my book “My Missing Peace,” this is a discipline. It is a new way of thinking, being and showing up. The majority of us will choose negativity as the path of least resistance when dealing with others or even our own self talk. It is where our mind easily goes because it is effortless to have negative thoughts, emotions, and dialogues. It is a learned behaviour that has been cultivated over our lifetime.

Thankfully, the brain is not hardwired as previously thought and we can in fact teach ourselves a new way of thinking by paving a new path over time. This is known as neuroplastic retraining. Often thought of for use in physical rehabilitation, it is also just as effective for psychological retraining. We can absolutely train our brains to automatically think and respond positively to different forms of stimulus. The key is repetition, repetition and more repetition. This speaks to the saying “neurons that fire together, wire together.” When we repeat a new behaviour over and over again we are actually rewiring the brain to think and/or respond differently. Conversely, we are also disabling old synapses that no longer serve us. At the beginning, our negative path of least resistance has tall grass and weeds, we have to lift our knees up high and it takes a lot of effort, thought and energy to get through this new path. We slip, we fall and stumble, and that’s ok, don't get discouraged. What is important is that we continue to embrace the new thought process, knowing that each time we show up differently, we are paving a smoother path which will soon become our new positive path of least resistance!

As time goes by, and we continue to rehabilitate our thinking patterns, we will begin to feel the positive effects. We will feel more energized and less fatigued as the cinder blocks of negativity finally begin to lift, until one day they are gone completely! You will find that you smile more often for no reason and your reactionary response has been replaced with a quiet calm.

Set a standard for yourself. A standard of what you will accept in your space and what you will not. At first people will be apprehensive, perhaps uncomfortable with your new boundaries. Suddenly, what had been accepted in the past is no longer tolerated. Some will have trouble navigating through new encounters with you. Again, that’s ok. It's important as we protect our energy, that we choose to do so in a loving, compassionate and understanding way and slowly people will begin to accept the new you. They may even begin to look at you in awe, and consider embracing the new way of thinking for themselves. Either way, you will begin to see and feel things change around you and within you. You have set the stage to generate deep inner peace by beating the drum of positivity and creating a vibration of wellness, a vibration of peace and a vibration of love and that is deeply healing.

Embrace the call to action and set the stage to begin living your best simply begins with you!

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